I felt it necessary to compare the rest of the Gung-Ho Guns to the power and might that is E.G. Mine. This section illustrates how the others would do in a fight with E.G., and how they would all lose. Well, then there's a reality check at the bottom of each one, but you didn't see that here. Is this a sad, pathetic attempt at more content? Of course not. I do also realize this section is really streching it, too. I've only got three up right now, I'll put up the rest at a later date.
Monev the Gale - The first thing you may notice about this fellow is his gun, either the one on his arm or the large apparatus he has on his back. We see that this is a very powerful gun, capable of blowing away an entire building and killing people within several blocks. The second thing you notice is that this is an extremely large, musclebound man that is clad in purple spandex and appears to have the top back half of his skull missing. How would this terror compare in a fight with E.G. Mine? Well, of course a well-placed spike will disable all the guns before he even has a chance to fire, and since Monev is such a wimp without his guns, and he's obviously not gonna be a physical match for our gunless, thin, lanky mine friend, Monev would bow down before him. It's obvious that if E.G. had killing tendencies as illustrated on the surface of the anime, it would be very easy for him to kill poor, defenseless Monev. Actually... I think Monev would take one look at E.G., rip his sphere from his body, then crush his head like a grape without even drawing a gun. But I'm trying to be funny, so E.G. would DEFINITELY win.
Hoppered the Gauntlet - I'll be fair, when I heard Hoppered giggle, my admiration for E.G. Mine wavered ever so slightly. Where E.G. could put everyone in a state of shock before the fight even began with his mad rhetoric skills, Hoppered might even be a match for him in that department. Noone giggles or makes irrelevent comparisons like Hoppered the Gauntlet. I'll give our little friend that since we never heard E.G. laugh. So there could be a verbal war going on before the fight even begins. When it did begin, Hoppered claims that nothing could contradict his Gouterrier. Obviously Hoppered never fought with E.G. Mine buddy would use his wires, the same as Vash did, to break Hoppered's bullet thingie. But E.G. would do it BETTER since E.G. is the master of the wire. Yes... I'm purposefully vague. Although Hoppered's voice is almost as good as E.G.'s, he WAS a really good fighter. He beat Vash, for christ's sake! He succeeded in breaking that plant that Vash was trying so hard to save. HE BEAT VASH. Unless you're a _ruthless_ Vash, Legato Bluesummers, or Millions Knives, you're not beating this guy.
Grey the Ninelives - Grey is a giant, unstoppable robot that ends up destroying a plant in the anime and a machine controlled by dwarves in the manga (I thought that was just beyond cool). He has a gun or some form of ammunition in almost every square inch of his body (fingers, thigh, uh... breasts), and it's really powerful stuff. This thing managed to outsmart Wolfwood in that his top half was blown off, but his legs still blew the plant up. How would E.G. beat this beast? He doesn't have human emotions, so he couldn't intimidate Grey with his voice or intimidating finger flexing... but you know what he'd do? He'd trick Grey into walking into a well so that he would rust and no longer be able to move. That way, he wouldn't die and none of his weapons could go off and hurt people anymore ^_^; For quicker results, he'd throw salt into the well right after Grey. Then he'd laugh and laugh and laugh... But in real life (or real cannon, as you prefer), Grey would blow E.G.'s head off before he could trick him into going anywhere. Um... yea, that's about all Grey does, really. Blow things up.
Legato Bluesummers - Dammit, I already told you Legato doesn't count since he's the leader! Well, if you insist... we've seen the slow defeat of Legato Bluesummers in the anime, how he bends to E.G.'s wishes out of fear. Of course, what other reason could he have to allowing the one who interrupted his lunch to go out and do as he pleases? Anyone else would've been dead in a second. But you could smell fear on Legato. That is one of the reasons Minebuddy was allowed to hunt Vash the Stampede... because Legato was scared. The other would be the verbal techniques I've mentioned so many times before. Oh yes, let's describe Legato. He's Knives' right hand man, he's got longish blue hair that hangs in one of his golden eyes, he wears a white suit with five spikes on one shoulder and a skull on the other. He has very, VERY powerful mind control techniques. He could probably crush you with the power of his thought ^_^ Most likely the reason he let E.G. hunt Vash was because he was severely ticked and just wanted left alone with his meal, Midvalley, and Midvalley's whores. If E.G. even thought about getting rough with Legato, Legato would have him gutted and put on display in one of the remaining 5 of the 7 great cities to show people that he is the greatest person on Earth next to Knives.
Dominique the Cyclops - This is the only lady amongst the fellows of the Gung-Ho Guns (unless you count Elegia the Crimsonnail, who's kinda half and half, but since s/he's in the manga, I haven't seen him/her and thus won't be doing an evaluation). She wears a brown trenchcoat and a matching hat, along with a mechanical eyepatch. The eyepatch will open up and you will be hypnotized by her Demon's Eye, making you loose all sense of time and you will be shot by her, since she's no slouch with her gun, either. She'd shoot you anyway. Of course, she would not shoot E.G. Mine. He would focus all his energy on his spikes to avoid the hypnosis of the Demon's Eye, then somehow turn the powers back on her. She would get down on her knees and bow before the power that is E.G. because he "screwed" with her and avoided the Demon's Eye. In reality... I'd hate to admit, but E.G. was the one who killed her and mounted her in August for Vash the Stampede to see. HOW he did this, I will never know. Perhaps he's got shrewd methods that we're unaware of. Perhaps she just gave herself up since she was already defeated. She DID commit suicide in the manga... perhaps he just came across her body and decided to take credit for it ^_^;
Caine the Longshot - This is one funkay-looking sniper. All E.G. would have to do is wander outta his site and sneak up behind him. You'd think the cloak would be able to conceal his position from EVERYBODY, but not our Minebuddy. E.G. Mine can see through clever disguises like that. E.G. would get behind him and disable the sniper rifle, then wrestle the gun outta Caine's hand so he doesn't kill himself. That's just the way our Minebuddy is. Actually... this is another character that chalked up a couple points with me. Obviously, when looking for a sniper, you would disreguard any random large unmanned rifles you found in the desert. What the HELL good is an invisibility cloak gonna do if the gun's still clearly in sight?! Caine would shoot our scrawny object of ridicule before he walked outta whatever building he was coming from on his way to take care of Caine. However, I will also admit to Caine's wussiness in that he HAD another gun, but chose to shoot himself rather than using that cloak in some fancy maneuver in an attempt to lure Vash into confusion so he could shoot the tall blonde guy. Grr... incompetent villians. He's not in the manga ;_;
Rai-Dei the Blade - Rat Bastard! He killed Minebuddy! Ahem, anyway, I believe Sumire at Make a Little Lightbulb in your Soul put it best when he called him an anachronistic Japanese swordsman. He's the spitting image of one, right down to the sword that reverts to a rifle. One of my favorite scenes in the series is when he holds up the challenge to Vash and Vash facefaults and says he can't read Japanese ^_^ That probably works better in the dub than it would have in the original. Had he not just casually strolled up and slit E.G.'s throat, E.G. would've bludgeoned him with his mine outerwear and left him unconscience in the middle of the desert with food and water so he would not die of course. The bludgeoning would not kill him. E.G. would've been able to sense the fact he was going to die had he not done it so slyly. Yea... that's it. The reality check comes back and hits us in the face with the undeniable fact that yes, he DID kill E.G. Mine, rather easily actually. That's another thing that kills me. The crazy bastard Minebuddy could've easily avoided his death had he stepped aside or avoided the sword in some way ^_^;
Leonof the Puppetmaster - Ok, this is a creepy looking guy who lets his puppets do all the dirty work while he controls them through an orb suspended from his fingers. Here's the drill. E.G. Mine would pull himself completely into his sphere to dodge the gunfire from the puppets. Then he'd roll between them to avoid squelching their lives. However, he would make an effort to roll overtop of Leonof to shatter his glass orb and put an end to the puppet control, but the roll would be a gentle one that would not end the Puppetmaster's life. To draw attention away from the fact he's rolling overtop the old man, E.G. would make pleasant conversation, throwing his hypnotic voice into one of the puppets, but Leonof wouldn't figure out that it was one of his puppets until too late. Hoppard the Gauntlet would then come out of the woodwork and there'd be a contest between the sphere and the gouterrier, Hoppard yelling incoherently about stealing techniques all the while. Actually, E.G. would probably get his head blown away by one of Leonof's puppets before he could blink twice without even realizing it was a puppet. If you have a vivid imagination, pretend it's a Leonof puppet. I'm sorry for the crappiness of this one, it's one am and I'm tired. I'll do better next time -_-;
Chapel the Evergreen - This is a tall clergyman that has weird gogglelike things over his eyes and dresses all in black. He has a large cross punisher rifle like Wolfwood's, but it splits into two machine guns lenthwise down the middle. Would you like to know Minebuddy's plan for this guy? They would exchange gunfire and spikes for awhile, E.G. Mine being careful to aim his spikes so they strike each individual bullet rather than poor Chapel. When Chapel ran out of ammo, he would see the light and go with God with a little instruction from E.G. Mine and never kill anyone again. Hmm... or Chapel would whip open his machine guns and blow E.G. Mine's ass to kingdom come before E.G. even had time to fire one spike. Why, Chapel could do this while talking to him and E.G. would more than likely not notice. He's just that dumb. There might be a more elaborate death involved here though, because we only see Chapel fighting Wolfwood, which is a straight fight since Wolfwood was Chapel's disciple. He could have other fighting styles we're unaware of. I'm fairly certain E.G. Mine does not, though.
Midvalley the Hornfreak - Well... wait, no. Give me a little bit to type this one. It could be interesting. Ok, this is Midvalley the Hornfreak. Any person who has the word "freak" in their name is worthy of my time. This is probably the only other Gung-Ho Gun that has a fanbase (what am I saying, the ONLY Gung-Ho Gun with a fanbase). He has dark hair and wears a dark blue suit with a pink shirt. He also is never seen without a saxophone. AKA Midvalley the Wild Whore. He's right up there with E.G. and Hoppard as far as goofiness goes simply for his line "Damn! My B flat! My B flat's gone!" That, combined with the look on his face, provided much laughs. It wouldn't be very difficult for Minebuddy to defeat this poor chap. If they faced off, all E.G. would have to do is fire two nonfatal shots. One would be to knock out his B flat so that it wouldn't injure any more people, and the other would slice the mechanism for his selfdestruct feature on his sax. Then Midvalley would no longer be a hornfreak, he would be a much kinder, gentler person who would play the sax for small children with no trouble whatsoever. Just without a B flat. Once that B flat is gone, I believe his insanity goes with it, and I believe Minebuddy knows this too. Well, no he doesn't. If the two were to ever face off, E.G. would probably be immediately blown to bits by a single soundwave due to the frailness of his body. But he wouldn't be shot. Oh no, Midvalley does nae carry a gun. The Wild whore is a notch lower than Caine probably, but still up there in goofiness.
Zazie the Beast - Whoo-hoo! My last Gung-ho Gun analysis! I'm sorry if this sucks, but I've been writing these since March, and it's now October. This is the last thing I need to add to the site in order for it to be finished. Zazie is a little kid who pretends to be... a little kid. He controls giant sandworms through an odd earpiece-type thing he wears. He looks like a cute little cowboy. He has a slight fanbase, but barely anything to speak of. He sounds like a little kid when going undercover as... a little kid, but when he's out of disguise, he sounds like an outlaw in his 30s. Perhaps he's just a midget? In the manga, Zazie the Beast IS the large insects. He's kinda creepy. Anyway... let's see. How would Minebuddy go about defeating Zazie? Most likely he would just mimic Vash and fire a single spike while nibly jumping around the sandworms on his spry little frame, throwing off their aim with his lilting voice. The spike would hit Zazie's communicator and that would be the end of the giant sandworms. The fallacy? E.G. would then have his head blown off by Zazie's two pistols. Eh, I probably could've put more effort into that. Oh well. I'm done!